What’s your me, we, world perspective when you’re sat in that chair?

To live and lead with purpose requires habits that keep us present – and purposeful – in every moment of every day. Or at least one step closer to that unattainable goal every day. As a PurposeFused partner, I am constantly working on that journey for myself, as well as thinking of ways to help our clients and partners do the same. And so as I sat in the dentist’s chair earlier this month, I recognized it as an incredible opportunity to walk the talk. Could I be purposeful as they poked, filed, scraped, and polished my teeth?

Research shows that when we have a sense of why what we’re doing matters (purpose), we are physically and mentally healthier, as well as more productive [see the PurposeFused Resource Guide for the abundant research proving these claims]. When we act in line with a purpose larger than ourselves, we also make the world around us better.

That’s why we help our clients to craft Purpose Statements, and One Page Purpose Game Plans: to get really clear on what they want to do to shape the future they want to be part of. But even with this clarity, if they don’t activate those commitments on a daily basis, purpose has none of those compelling benefits for our individual, team, or societal wellbeing and performance.

Purpose At the Dentist

Hopefully, you don’t spend more than an hour or two a year in the dentist’s chair. But it’s an excellent metaphor for the mundane, even unpleasant or painful, activities that are part of even the most purpose-aligned life. We call these activities ‘hill sprints’ in PurposeFused lingo – the things that themselves may be mundane or painful but are contributing to something mission-critical, and can only – or best – be done by you. Keeping your larger purpose in mind during such ‘hill sprints’ in your work and life is a worthwhile exercise because it can be so difficult. And because of the huge potential benefit in reducing the mental and/or physical discomfort of those moments.
So how did I manage this challenge of staying purposeful throughout my teeth cleaning? My behaviors and thoughts can be categorized in the three dimensions of impact we discuss and strategize at PurposeFused: Me, We, and World.

Me

The body has a critical role in being purposeful. If we’re not breathing properly, we get stuck in Fight or Flight mode, and have almost no chance of thoughtfully doing, saying, or being how we know we need to if we’re going to advance our purpose. When we haven’t had enough sleep or nutritious food, we can’t possibly be our best selves.

And so, in the dentist chair, I reminded myself to breathe deeply – a reminder I had to repeat several times during some of the toughest scraping. I also scanned my body repeatedly, looking for places I was tensing muscles and intentionally released them. My ability to identify these practices and do them, even in stressful conditions, was thanks to my ongoing habits of meditation, as well as mindful breathing and movement.

We

There are lots of other people involved in my dental appointment. Most obviously, the dentist, technician, and receptionist, but also my husband who referred me to the practice, my company that provides dental insurance to offset the cost, and a massive cadre of inventors, engineers, scientists, and businesspeople who made available the technology being used. As the chilling sound of scraping continued, I focused on my gratitude to all of these people responsible for my healthy teeth.

Inspired by Valarie Kaur’s book See No Stranger from our team’s anti-racism practice, I also spent some time wondering about all of those people involved directly and indirectly in my appointment. What did they have for dinner tonight? Who takes care of their teeth? What do they consider to be their purpose? These were much more engaging and pleasant thoughts than, “What if she hits a nerve?” and “Why don’t I floss more?”

These We dimension habits of gratitude and empathy for the people on our teams – personal and professional – are powerful ways to keep us connected to our purpose.

World

Finally, I was intentional to the massive privilege to experience this unpleasant scraping, picking, poking, and cleaning. Dental health is distributed extremely unequally in the US and globally, along economic and racial lines. The health of our teeth is intimately interconnected with our well-being more broadly and longevity. How could I be anything other than joyfully grateful to have access to this top-notch care for my pearly whites?

Making it a habit to connect to the broader context of whatever activity you’re in the midst of – particularly those that aren’t your favorite – helps us remember why what you’re doing matters, and how it improves lives of people around you. And therein lies the motivating power of purpose.

So What?

As a result of these purposeful habits, I suffered less physically from the dentist’s work, as would be expected based on research about the connection between gratitude and pain[1]. I also had a much more pleasant mental experience than in other cleanings, when I’ve dwelled on default questions like “What if she hits a nerve?” or “What if she finds a cavity?” Instead, I was musing about the 3D printers, product scientists, and sales reps who got all the equipment to my dentist’s office, and what she and her hygienist ate for dinner last night.

On the We level, I was certainly more friendly to all the staff than I might have been on another busy Thursday when my appointment took 20 minutes longer than scheduled. I also supported a local business owned by a woman of Color. And that is good for shifting wealth inequality.

None of these outcomes will reverse climate change or end systemic racism. But since I must continue to visit the dentist, and do several other unpleasant or at least mundane tasks, I will do them with the benefit of these purposeful habits. And continue to observe the small but tangible impacts of that approach on myself, the people around me, and the world beyond that.

If you’d like to learn more about how to discover and apply your purpose across every sphere of your life – including even being at the dentist!!… please get in touch!

[1] https://positivepsychology.com/neuroscience-of-gratitude/

Author: Nell Derick Debevoise, Partner, PurposeFused